Legal Antics

Happy Holidays!

Wishing you and yours Happy Holidays! 

It's magic I say!

But As a Paralegal? No.

Lawyer: Ben*, if I e-mail you something, can you figure out how to print it on legal-size paper?

Paralegal: Ummm, sure. [Later brings back printed text.]

Lawyer: Oh, great! You know, you have a future as a printer!

575 Lexington Avenue
New York, New York

via Overheard in the Office, Sep 4, 2007

Hello, McFly?

Via the Fail Blog, a very unfortunate name for a law firm:

One wonders why the "handsome" ones have to resort to Craigslist?

Handsome successful out of town attorney seeks sexy woman for affair - m4w - 32 (financial district)

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Date: 2009-11-21, 8:41PM PST

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I am a handsome married attorney, who will be in San Francisco for business off and on over the next few months, looking for a hot sexy woman to have a steamy affair with while I am in town. I will have lots of time to pamper and have fun with a challenging, intelligent, and sexually adventurous lady in all the exciting and luxurious ways the bay area has to offer. I especially enjoy great restaurants, clubs, and wine country. I have heard a lot of women get turned on by being with a man who would otherwise be off limits. Are the rumors true? I have pics to trade and have never disappointed in the size department.

• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 1477021650

Trying to recall if any of my colleagues use a cane...

His Friends Don't Have the Heart to Tell Him It's a Mr. Peanut Costume

Boy #1: What are you gonna be?

Boy #2: Soul of the devil.

Boy #1: What were you last year?

Boy #2, annoyed: Soul of the devil.

Boy #1: And the year before that?

Boy #2: Soul of the devil! I always go as soul of the devil.

Boy #1: What's soul of the devil?

Boy #2: This character I made up. He's like a lawyer for the devil. I have a cane.

--Park Slope, Brooklyn
via Overheard in New York, Dec 13, 2009

One wonders how many former hookers this guy unknowingly dated.

Hola, life long love affair in Arizona - 36 (Scottsdale, Arizona)

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Fecha: 2009-11-22, 11:44PM ART

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I am a young, fit, handsome man living in the fabulous resort town of Scottsdale, Arizona. I want to make a difference in the life of a beautiful young and intelligent Latina woman who will enjoy moving to Scottsdale and living a wonderful life with me.

Me: I had a solid childhood in a secure, fun loving catholic family with three sisters. I learned family values, manners, and a strong sense of responsibility. I am funny, smart, and athletic. By profession I am a lawyer; I work hard but make a comfortable living and enjoy a pleasant lifestyle.

You: You have a minimum of 2 years of college education, you speak conversational English, you are healthy (both physically and emotionally), you are thin, pretty and beautiful, you are NOT (and never worked as a) a prostitute, you are between 21 and 30 years of age. You are an emotionally stable woman raised in a family with manners and family values.

When I find you, we will build a life long love affair where we respect each other, love each other, sacrifice for each other, and aspire to bring out the best of each other. I want you to be the best you can be, and I need you to help me be the best person I can be.

If this sounds like an opportunity that will make you happy, please write to me together with several pictures and we can start learning more about each other. I can’t wait to meet you!

• Location: Scottsdale, Arizona
• NO se puede contactar al anunciante con servicios o intereses comerciales

It's like an Agatha Christie novel!

Ladies. He's begging for help. Any takers?

Law Student Seeks Study Break - m4w - 27

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Date: 2009-12-05, 1:30PM EST

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I'll be blunt. It's finals time and I'm pent up. I am tall, handsome, and will be a lawyer in 1 year. Looking for a date and some sexual reprieve. Please help.

• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 1496330268

Real lawyers aren't concerned with details like that...

A Real Man Would Reinforce My Delusion

Female employee, pointing at computer screen: I say we take this guy to court!

Male employee: There's nobody there, Megan*.

Newton, Massachusetts

via Overheard in the Office, Dec 7, 2009

So weird! This happened to me too!

Via the Fail Blog: